So, the two best ad campaigns of the last decade are the Geico.com “So easy a caveman can do it” and the pleasant “Mac and the PC” ads. Both ads are selling computer-related product. So successful are these ads that both stars of said ads have been able to parlay their consumer talent into a potentially more profitable career in television and film. The actor that plays the Caveman in the Geico ads has been rewarded with a sitcom deal at ABC. And Justin Long, the Mac in the Mac ads, is now starring in the big time summer blockbuster LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD, side by side with superstar Bruce Willis.

Nearly twenty years ago Bruce Willis made the jump from TV star to film star with the original DIE HARD, a film Entertainment Weekly bestowed “the greatest action film of all-time”. A quick aside: DIE HARD is good enough to earn such an “honor”, but it is inconceivable that a magazine that purports to “know” film would have a list called “The 25 Greatest Action Films Of All-TIME”, and not include Michael Mann’s masterpiece HEAT , a film considered by most cinephiles as the greatest action film of the 90's.

DIE HARD not only defined Bruce Willis’ career, but it describes it. Every time Mr. Willis looked to be down (HUDSON HAWK), he would bounce right back with work like PULP FICTION. Or after being pronounced dead in THE LAST BOY SCOUT, along came the best performance of his career in THE SIXTH SENSE. I think it’s fair to say that no one believes Bruce Willis is going to go away, and with his willingness to closet his ego for smaller character driven roles, he’s earned his stripes.

LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD is the third sequel to DIE HARD, and with Willis’ age and career depth, it’s easy to assume it to be the last. The story involves the ever present Dr. Evil, here played by DEADWOOD’s Timothy Olyphant, with the diabolical plot to take over the world one hard drive at a time. Mr. Willis, or John McCane, rescues a young hacker played by Mac’s Justin Long from Olyphant’s marauding band of hacker whackers, and POOF, instant wise-cracking sidekick. The idea of unplugging a wired nation in order to steal a shitload of money is pretty good.

But, of course it wouldn’t be DIE HARD without a series of complicated Rube Goldberg action sequences, edging dangerously close to self-parody. The action is temporarily interrupted by a cute cameo by fleshy filmmaker Kevin Smith.

I won’t spoil the ending for you. Because I can’t. With about twenty minutes left, the movie went into an auto pilot insert-resolution-finale-here conclusion, wherein I dozed off. Modern action films with their non-stop gun play, constant explosions, and high-speed car chases have an odd effect on me: what with sitting in a comfy chair in a nice dark air-conditioned room; the action sounds become white noise like a hard rain on a tin roof...zzzzzzzzzz. Thankfully I was pleasantly awakened by the glorious strains of CCR’s “Fortunate Son”. As far as I could tell everything ended well.

I can’t totally blame the film for my cinema narcolepsy. I have been staying up all hours of the night downloading my life into a hard drive, where nothing short of a cyber-terrorist will ever be able to steal away my inner hopes and dreams... Holy shit!

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