|
THE UNCUT VERSION
By Eric Matthew Harvey
Sure as I lost $38 dollars at the dog track tonight, when RAMBO hits DVD in a few months, there’s going to be an UNRATED version. Which is going to be absolute bullshit, because the damn thing is unrated right now. There’s nothing you could do to make this film more violent, nihilistic or better. They might put in a 5 second scene of a character staring at the camera and saying “moo”, which by MPAA rules, would not make it the R-rated theatrical cut and therefore not allowed to be marketed as such.
But don’t let them fool you. See this sucker now on a big screen before you miss out. If this isn’t one of the most violent and blood-soaked R-rated films of all time, I’ll eat my hat. Sylvester Stallone is the only one who seems to remember what action movies are supposed to be all about. 80 minutes of non-stop action, brutality and gobs of ridiculous gore, both real and CGI (I call old school FX real because well, they’re more real than CGI).
This time, Rambo is a snake wrangler who ferries some missionaries up the river so they can get either killed or captured. Then the coach from THE WHITE SHADOW turns up asking Rambo to take some mercenaries up to where he dropped them off so they can find out if they’ve been forced to die or not by Burmese military child molesters. Rambo’s boner for a chick missionary proves too much for his brain and his desire to save her so maybe he can bang her makes him finally realize, after three previous movies, all he’s good at is killing. That’s it. This hiding in Thailand shit playing with your snake while you try to make peace with your past shit is over.
The movie sets up the characters and knocks them down in what is possibly one of the best shoot-out scenes since Peckinpah’s WILD BUNCH. Of course, the film doesn’t have the message-laden weight of WILD BUNCH to contend with, which may, in after thought, make RAMBO a much more pleasant experience for action junkies. RAMBO is pure adrenaline, pure nihilism and is one of the only movies in recent memories that actually gives you the movie you pay for and then some. The shell shock I experienced after exiting the theater was quite magical. Sylvester Stallone did it for you and did it right. This time, we all get to win.
Return to Classics
Home Page
|
